Apology curd on the face! Apology full stop on the face…! Why is a small apology so difficult in politics?

Over there in Britain…

I take responsibility for the defeat. Former UK PM Rishi Sunak apologized to the country for the Conservative Party’s worst performance in the UK general election. Then he praised his rival and Britain’s next Prime Minister Keir Starmer.

Here in our country,

There is uproar in Maharashtra politics over the collapse of the 35 feet high Shivaji statue in Sindhudurg. All opposition parties including Shiv Sena (UBT) and NCP are cornering the Shinde government on this issue. They are demanding an apology from them. Allegations and counter-allegations are being made. Even the Navy is being held responsible. But no one is apologizing.

Why is apology so expensive in politics?

Why does no politician in our country want to apologize? What does he lose by apologizing? If we look at the political history, we will realize how difficult the word apology has become. Or rather, our politicians have made it so… So let’s talk about this word apology today and also include the common people in it. Let’s also think about the difference between the apology of politicians and the common man… Why don’t politicians apologize?

What is the psychology of forgiveness?

Before we talk about the apology of politicians, let us first know what is the psychology of apology? In one of the cases of Prashant Bhushan, sociologist Yogendra Yadav had said something very remarkable about apology. He wrote that five conditions must be fulfilled for an apology. The first condition is that something really wrong has happened. To apologize, it is very important that a mistake has been made somewhere, something has happened that makes one feel that this thing will not be considered morally justified. Only then will someone apologize for his mistake or moral fault! The second condition is to have a sense of acceptance in the mind, to accept with complete honesty that yes, a mistake has been made. The third condition is to have a sense of responsibility, to be prepared that whatever may be the consequences of the mistake, whatever loss has been caused, I am responsible for all of that because I have committed the mistake. The fourth condition is the sense of regret which makes you say that there is pain in your heart about the mistake that has been made, you are in deep regret that ah! What has happened to me! The fifth and last condition is related to a resolution, there should be a resolution in the mind that such a mistake will never be repeated. That is, if we look at it in its essence, then it will be clear that regret is necessary to apologize. Apart from this, it is necessary to have determination in the mind.

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After understanding the psychology of apology, let us consider what happens in the case of politicians? What are they afraid of that makes them want to avoid apologizing? If we consider some reasons, it will be clear that Politicians want to avoid apology for these reasons.

1. Appearing weak: Politicians feel that apologising can be seen as a sign of insecurity or weakness, which opponents can exploit.
2. Lack of accountability: If you don’t apologize then you won’t have to face the consequences.
3. Loss of reputation: Admitting a mistake can result in loss of reputation and credibility.
4. Fear of legal consequences: Politicians fear that their apology may be used as evidence in legal proceedings.
5. Loyalty to the party: The attitude of what’s said is said… and avoiding apologizing to avoid criticizing fellow leaders.
6. Fear of apology being used against oneself: The apology should not be used against oneself in the future.
7. Ego: Some leaders have difficulty admitting mistakes because of personal reputation or ego.
8. Fear of setting a precedent: Apologising on one issue may lead to demands for an apology on other issues.
9. Reputation loss: In some circles, apologizing is seen as a loss of dignity or reputation.

Whereas if we think about it, compared to the dangers of not apologizing, apology is a wonderful word. There are many examples from India to America when a President or a common politician apologized to the people and the public not only forgave that leader but also respected him. American President Bill Clinton made a big mistake. He apologized to the people. People are ready to forgive when apologies are made for mistakes. If we remember the emergency, people forgot their hatred towards Indira Gandhi and handed over power to her again. If seen in this way, apologizing can have many positive effects. If we talk about some of them, then it can have…

• Empathy and accountability are visible.
• Mutual tension is removed and trust is established.
• Demonstrates maturity and leadership.
• Constructive dialogue is encouraged.

Then why be ashamed of apologizing? We can only hope that perhaps the attitude of politicians changes in the future and they start coming forward to apologize with an open heart…the way politics is changing. Hopefully we will see this day soon. What do you say? Just say Amen!!

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Extra shots…

Let us lighten this serious discussion with a satire. Long ago, I had written a satire on the apology of the common man in which an attempt was made to feel his helplessness intensely. That is, the common man is so helpless in this system that he does not have any topic to apologize for… although it is a different matter that he is ready to apologize for everything. He has the moral courage and determination necessary to apologize.

The story of a simple wish of a simple man…

I have a strong desire to say sorry today. Who should I say it to? Now if I have a desire then I have a desire. If I have to apologize then I have to. I am also afraid that Sahibs may look down upon an ordinary man’s apology. They may think in their mind that son, first develop the courage to say sorry to me. And suppose I apologize to someone forcibly then that person may start scolding me. Look at my helplessness Sahib, I am not able to even find a way to apologize. Forget about fake one, I am not able to find even a real reason to say sorry.
I cannot remember ever hurting anyone. Behaving badly with anyone. Having the audacity to intimidate anyone. What kind of weakness is this? Have we gone so far as to be misled? We are unable to fulfill even our smallest wishes. We are unable to even deserve an apology? Alas! Alas! A moment of extreme despair. The man does not have any story of his notable misbehavior?

In these difficult moments of personal trauma, I try to probe the flashbacks of my life. But I find all the stories of breaking down, being distressed, losing, panicking, being humiliated with myself. So many tears of humiliation have come out that if we stock them, a good tank can hold water for two days. Alas! What a petty life I have lived! I am not able to find any proper reason to apologize to anyone.

Headlines like ‘It seems we have been wasted’ have started flashing in my mind. My insignificance is now moving towards dwarfism. Such a grave insult, Prabhu! You have not written any mean activity in the life of a simple man?

If you meet people, everyone has enough stories to tell about hurting others. People have found opportunities in this field. We missed it due to our weakness! What an animalistic life we ​​have lived!

I kept agreeing with him on every occasion of hurting others. I could not express my opinion anywhere. I could not even raise the flag of protest anywhere. If something went wrong, I could not stop it. I maintained cordiality. Can impotent agreement show the mirror to anyone? Without showing the mirror, will it hurt? What reason will there be to apologize? You small man, your goodness should be crushed like cigarette butts.

So, even the smallest wish of an ordinary man is not getting fulfilled these days. By the way, what do you think, did it ever get fulfilled earlier, then let me tell all such people on your behalf, sorry Bhidu..!

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